She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
