brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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