Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
it was like having sex with a tree stump
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Randomize
