Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
