Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
