i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
