its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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