dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
How external is "for external use only"?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
