I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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