I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
well you can't waste a boner
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Can't talk, ducks in the car
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