when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
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