Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
