her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
We talked him into tasing himself.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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