I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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