I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Randomize
