His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Randomize
