I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
