She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
