yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
