I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize
