Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
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I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
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I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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