3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
