he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
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i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
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Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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