Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
