Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
