I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
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this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
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When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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