you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
