he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
