I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
