So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Randomize
