I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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