I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
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I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
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You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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