Have you finally orgasmed yet?
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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