Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
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