Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
