Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
nutella sex= disaster
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
