I'm really into asian looking animals
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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