remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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