i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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