hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
We don't watch enough power rangers
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?