It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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