Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
