i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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