its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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