Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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