Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
