sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Randomize
