thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
