It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
false alarm. still invincible.
i will never coherently bang her
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
