I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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